Plot Bunny Annihilation
by MeowSaysKat
Summary: Earth is being invaded by evil plot bunnies that turn people OOC! What will happen to our five favorite teenagers? How will they cope with the craziness? Will they be able to save the world from total annihilation? Will Beast Boy and Raven finally confess their love like they should have done in the TV show? Why are there so many questions? Only one way to find out!
1. Chapter 1

A/N: Hey guys! This is my first FanFic! I've decided to give it a try after reading soooo much of it myself. O-O (such a geek, lol) Anyway, this first chapter kinda serves as a introduction/prologue, from the perspective of an invader. By the way, he isn't actually the main character, and the whole story won't be in first person. Oh, and don't worry, once a few things get going, it'll get more funny. Or at least, I'll try to make it more funny T_T

I've already written the first 5 chapters, but it takes time for me to upload them because i write it on mobile, and there's a bunch of editing, and so on, so I'll try to update as soon as i can.

Also, just to let you know, i ship BBxRae, and RobStar, and CyBee, and Flinx, and yada yada yada. Anyway, here it is, Plot Bunny Annihilation!

Disclaimer: I don't own Teen Titans. So many people would be dating right now if i did. Beast Boy and Raven forever! *fangirling*

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Chapter 1- Fluffilumptropolis

There is only one mirror in my house.

Because I'm too damn cheap to buy another one. So, naturally, I found myself looking in this one very often. Today, though, I found myself slightly flustered as I gazed at my reflection one last time. Before leaving, I slicked back the fur on top of my head and made sure my bunny ears were standing up perfectly straight.

"You can do this Bun'nee," I told myself out loud. Today was the day that everything would change forever, the day I get to prove myself to my lord, Dark Fuffb'all.

I stood in front of the door for a while and looked back.

"Well, old home, this could be the last I ever see of you. Goodbye..." I muttered.  
Taking a deep breath, I inhaled the familiar scent of carrots and old feet that I had grown to love. I repeated my personal mantra, "You is smart, you is kind, you is important."

Slowly but surely, I gathered all of the confidence I had in my short, furry body and opened the door. Walking out, I saw three beautiful moons shining over the horizon.

I chuckled as I remembered my studies of other planets, how their days were lit by a giant star! How lame! Here on Fluffilumptropolis, we had three bright moons all day, and dimmed at nighttime. Our soil was made of marshmallows, fluff, and vanquished souls. Oh, how I love this land, I thought.  
Quickly, I was jolted back to reality by the beeping of a hop taxi horn.

"Ay, ya comin or not? I ain't got all day to be waitin!"

"Sorry" I shouted as I hastily hopped in. He told me to pay in advance, so I handed him 20 carrots.  
The taxi lurched wildly as it suddenly lifted off the ground. I held on to my seat as it broke through the fourth wall and landed me in my exact destination. The driver reached back and threw me out the window.

I groaned as I stood up and looked at the new scenery - I was in a military base, crowded with other plot bunnies just like me. All around, there were various warships and weapons, made from the mast horrific nightmares and conquered dimensions. Soldiers stood at the doorways, wearing the strongest plot armor in the multiverse.

"Well, well, well," mocked a mocking mockers voice, "if it isn't Bun'nee, the only plot bunny who hasn't conquered a world!"

Somewhere else, in another dimension, a green, square-headed alien boy sneezed. "Tissues, Gir, tissuessssssssss!"

"Shut up, Hop," I retorted as he pushed past me. Suddenly, the lights dimmed as a booming voice sounded at the other end of the hall.

"Welcome conquerors, to the annual plot bunny briefing ceremony!"  
Everyone cheered. I, only the other hand, struggled to see past all of the taller rabbits. The voice, which belonged to Lord Dark Fluffb'all, continued on.

"All of you are well accomplished world dominators! I'm truly proud of you all! Except for one..." he added with a sinister glare. "Bun'nee has not conquered even a soul!"

Everyone laughed. My cute, fluffy cheeks burned with rage. (The ones on my face of course).

"So, I've assigned to him a...special task. BUN'NEE! GET OVER HERE!"

I was shocked, that he had actually called me! I struggled to shove my way through the crowd. Finally, I made it to the platform and stood in front of him. The crowd laughed at how short I was in comparison to him.

"People, people, quiet down," he said softly, putting his arm around my shoulders. I braced myself. "This young fool will be sent to...EARTH!"

As the crowd once again burst into tumultuous laughter, Lord Dark Fluffb'all stepped on a button which released the ground out from under me. I fell through the floor and landed in what seemed to be...a ship? 'Oh no.' I thought as the engine roared.

The last thing I heard before blasting off into space was a deadpan "goodbye" from my lord. The back of my head was glued to my seat as I left the atmosphere of my home world. I struggled to calm down and control my breathing as I almost went into complete panic. Gradually, the ship began to slow down.

"Lucky I spent so much time studying other planets...Earth shouldn't be too unfamiliar to me."

Studying the inside of the spacecraft, I noticed two buttons: and eject button, and one that read, "inter-dimensional bunny hop" wanting to get this over with AND to prove myself, I pushed the second and once again flew through the 4th wall.

I heard the sound of typing...

Suddenly; there was a large BOOM as my vessel was violently plunged into the ground. I quickly clicked eject and got the hyuck outta there.

Thank Fluff for plot armor! I said as I distanced myself from the smoking spacecraft. It blew up in the background, as I took in the scenery.

The sky was dark, and littered with small, twinkly stars. A single, round, moon sat in the sky, half covered by small clouds. Tall buildings stretched into the sky and cars were parked on the sides of the streets, waiting for their owners to return once again. Flaming humans ran wildly form the crash site, desperately trying to extinguish their burning clothes. It was simply beautiful.

Yet one feature stood out among the rest - a giant t-shaped tower in the distance. Yes, I knew where I was. I knew EXACTLY where I was. I was in Jump City, and my first target:

The Teen Titans.

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A/N: So, guys, please tell me what you think so far! Your reviews would be greatly appreciated, especially 'cuz I'm just starting out. Constructive criticism welcome! Oh, and please, no flames...they make me sad T_T


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Hey guys! Thanks for all the views and reviews! Here's chapter 2!

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Chapter 2 - Itz Jump City, Jump, Jump City, Byaaaatch

So...it was a seemingly normal day in Jump City. The sun was shining, and people filled the streets. There were children in the parks, and overly hormonal teenagers in the malls. It was the first day of summer, after all. In fact, usually on this day, more people would be at the beach, rather than flooding the streets. There was a reason for this, of course.

Last week, the beach was almost completely empty. Even though it was a nice, warm, spring day, the only inhabitants at the boardwalk were the seagulls and the lifeguards. The lifeguards all thought that the people these days were far too lazy to come out and enjoy the sun anyway.

Their boredom was short-lived, though, as something strange fell out of the sky and landed right on their turf. Startled, they all cautiously moved toward what seemed to be a giant rock.

"Whoa, what is that?" One said.

"I don't know dude, but it sure as hell would make one badass surfboard!" Said another, this one happening to be blonde. The first lifeguard smacked him across the back of his head.

"Ouch dude!"

"Stop it, both of you," said a third, female lifeguard, whose name happened to be Ebony Darkness Dementia Raven Way. "We have to figure out what this is quick, so I can get home to Dumbledore." Ebony walked up to the rock, and tapped it lightly. Nothing happened.

"Laaaaame," said the blonde. Before the sane, description-less lifeguard could stop him, the idiot ran up to the space rock and kicked it. It actually cracked open, and out popped a very pissed off slimy alien thingy.

"Aaaaaaaaaggggghhhhhh!" screamed the blonde and the no-face simultaneously.

"Ew ew EEEEWWWW!" exclaimed Ebony.

Suddenly, five strange teenagers appeared out of nowhere. One of them was dressed like a gay traffic light, another had a extremely fake looking tan, one was so green he looked like he should be barfing constantly, another was half of an outdated computer that probably wasn't compatible with Google Chrome, and the last was a black girl- erm- a goth...they were none other than the...

"Teen Titans, go!" shouted Robin.

The team rushed into action. Raven teleported the poor lifeguards to safety.

"Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" Ebony shouted with glee as she flew through a portal.

Raven sighed and facepalmed.

The slimy alien thingy squelched.

Starfire spoke. "Glrrdlskletch! Why are you doing the invading of Earth?"

*squeal*

"Grrrrrr!" Star replied as her and her team charged Glrrdskletch. Raven used her Azarath Metrion Zinthos thing to send a pigeon hurtling at the alien. Cyborg shot it, Robin hit it with his stick (heh), Beast Boy turned into a gorilla and farted in its snouts...and finally, Starfire, his former betrothed, kicked his ass to kingdom come.  
All that was heard was a squeal as Glrrdlskletch flew back to outer space.

The lifeguards were relieved that the alien was gone, and approached the teens to thank them. Ebony Darkness Dementia Raven Way tried to hug Beast Boy, but Raven shot her a death glare, which did not go unnoticed by Cyborg, who raised an eyebrow.

"I'm coming, Dumbly-poo," said the Mary Sue as she vanished into the ether.

"Duuuuuuude..." said Beast Boy and the blonde simultaneously. Their eyes widened as they looked at each other. "Duuuuuuuude!" they said in unison once again.

No Face the Lifeguard shook his head and walked away. The Titans soon followed suit, and turned back towards the Tower.

Yet, when the no face lifeguard looked around, he noticed something - the sand was covered in alien goo, which he wasn't about to clean. He whistled and walked away, pretending that nothing even happened.

For the rest of that week, the sand stayed green, and the goo was starting to sink in deeper. Whatever people came to the beach didn't stay long, because they quickly got grossed out. Cries of, "omg wtf" and "ewwww it got in my hair" were heard all throughout Jump City, and finally, the people gave up on trying to go to the beach.

So now, the parks were crowded. Oh, joy. Any criminal who had community service would much rather have suffered the death penalty.

But somewhere, somebody was actually having fun. Five 'somebodies' to be exact. Yes, our favorite Titans (sorry, Titans East) were enjoying the weather on their own, personal beach. Well, most of them were enjoying it, anyway.

Raven, of course, would much rather be writing her secret FanFiction about her Malchior fantasies, which, by the way, were not. actually. real. They were just for the enjoyment of the readers. The rather, perverted, readers. No one knew it was her, anyway. Who would ever suspect a username like MoshiMoshiKawaiiLove? Exactly. No one.

The only reason she was out there in the first place was because everyone made a serious effort to persuade her. Starfire flew around her in circles, saying things like, "Friend Raven, why must you insist on being the pooper of parties?" or, "Please, come, it will be most enjoyable!" (heh) Cyborg promised her that he would make waffles for the next three weeks, which, secretly, got her mouth watering. Robin threatened to blast his trash rap music for 24 hours straight, and of course, Beast Boy hit her with the puppy eyes.

Oh, man, the puppy eyes. Everyone though puppies were cute. Even Raven. To not think so would be...cruelty in itself. But there was something about this puppy in particular- this small, green puppy had an effect on her like no other. She just had to give in. And, Azar, was it annoying.

So Raven agreed to come out, but only to stop the torture, not because she wanted to. That's why she was outside in the heat, under a black, gothic looking umbrella, not even bothering to wear her cloak, and reading a book. Or, half-reading a book.

She couldn't help but watch all of her friends playing in the water. They were too noisy not to draw attention. But one thing she saw caught her eye for quite a while. It had been just a glance. A small glance, at a green shirtless boy, who was, in fact, very well toned. But she brushed it aside as foolishness and continued reading her book. Then she glanced again, almost accidentally. But this time it turned into a stare, and the empath decided that her book wasn't very interesting after all.

Raven almost got up and joined them. Almost. Something else had caught her eye as she stood up, something horrific.

'Oh no,' she thought as she saw a small, furry creature hop across her path and stop in front of her.  
Raven absolutely hated bunnies. With a passion. In fact, she was secretly scared of them, ever since she got stuck inside that hat...

The bunny eyed her curiously.

"There, there, you stupid fur ball," she managed, backing up slowly. It hopped in her direction, and she let out a small, girly shriek, tripping over her umbrella as she tried to move back.  
Ravens eyes widened as the bunny hopped up on top of her stomach, and looked her in the eye.

"Hey there, the name's Bun'nee, and I've come to take over your world!"

Raven screamed as the plot bunny raised his tiny, pathetic paws and chanted, "You is smart, you is kind, YOU IS IMPORTANT!"

A vortex swirled over her head. The last thing she heard before blacking out was, "Welcome to part one of the OOC Masquerade."

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There's chapter 2, and the first appearance of our favorite heroes! Hoped you guys enjoyed it! Please R&R!


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Okay, sorry for the wait, got caught up in some cray cray business o-o. Hopefully, i wont take so long next time. Also, i might publish a one-shot soon. Anyway, thanks for all the views and reviews! You guys rock, and make me feel special! Virtual hugs for all! \(^-^)/

Disclaimer: It could've been me, but no, i do not own the T-E-E-N T-I- T - A-N-S, TEEN TI-TANS, GO!

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Chapter 3 - The Beginning of Something Ratchet, Part 1

"Dude! I'm not going to do it!"

"You lost the bet, grass stain, and a deal's a deal!"

"She'll kill me! She'll literally kill me, chop me up into little green pieces, and send me to another dimension!"

Cyborg frowned at his friend. "You were so confident that you made the punishment, 'whoever loses has to dump a bucket of water on Raven's head,' " he said, mimicking the changeling's voice.

Robin burst out laughing. Starfire made out with a strange fish in the background, and no one seemed to notice.  
The Teen Titans were still enjoying their day on the beach, but the green beast got himself into hot water. He bet Cyborg that he could build a sand castle shaped like the T-tower. And of course, he failed. But even Beast Boy should've known that any punishment involving the dark empath was too evil to even be thought of.

So why did Beast Boy seal his own fate? Well, I, the awesome and magnificent narrator shall tell you.  
It all started two weeks ago, in the common room. Starfire was making some horrid Tamaranean delicacy that apparently involved toe jam, mustard, peanut butter, and, much to everyone's surprise, a lock of each Titan's hair.

It was supposedly going to bring their souls together in some kind of friendship link, or something like that. As far as Starfire was concerned, everyone was going to eat it whether they liked it or not. So, of course, the main thing on everyone else's mind was a plan of escape from the innocent alien girl.

Robin was listening to music in his headphones, and head-banging like an idiot. It was so loud; everyone could hear the song clearly. Of course, it would've been cool if he was trying to pull off the whole 'rebellious teenager with the loud music' thing, or if he was listening to punk rock or something that screamed 'testosterone'. Sadly, this was not the case, as the rest of the Titans were forced to listen to the My Little Pony Friendship is Magic theme song.

Raven was, like usual, trying to drown out everything else with some good old fashioned book reading. It was not an easy task, but her years of meditation always paid off in these situations. But even so, the book had not only held her attention, but took it captive. Her entire soul seemed to be absorbed into the book, and she hadn't blinked for quite a while. What it was that she was reading, I can't say, because as I write she is holding a knife to my head.

Cyborg, who would usually be engaged in a video game with his best friend, was on the phone with a certain, eastern Titan. He seemed to be having a deep conversation.

Of course, this left Beast Boy with absolutely nothing to do. He just sat on the couch across from Raven, and drummed his fingers on the table in front of him.

Tap. Tap. Tap.

"Hey, Raven! You wanna pla-"

Death glare.

"Never mind, sheesh!"

Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap. TAP. TAP.

"Beast Boy?! Do you mind?"

"So not fair, Rae! Robin can blast his music, but I can't tap?"

"No, you can't tap." (heh) "And yes, Robin can blast his music because I'll get him for it later."

Beast Boy was pleasantly surprised at Raven's last remark. 'HER getting REVENGE? That's a first,' he thought.

"Is there something wrong with that?"

Beast Boy flushed red. 'Oh crap! I forgot she can tell what I'm thinking! Umm, um, um...don't think of anything weird! Ummm, dogs, cats, sheep, the emu that winked at me when I went to the zoo!'

Raven slightly chuckled. Slightly. "Don't worry, Beast Boy, I don't do it all the time. I don't usually like invading other people's privacy. Mostly because I expect the same from others, too."

The green changeling exhaled. Then he thought of something.

"Hey, if you don't like to invade other people's privacy, why'd you just do it now? To me?"

"Honestly, it's because you hadn't made a corny joke in a while, and I was beginning to get worried."

"Oh, heh, thanks...I guess," he muttered. 'She was worried? About me? That's another first...at least I know she isn't in my mind right now. Yeah, now I can think about my arsenal of crappy jokes, and loudest farts, and video games, and how hot Raven looks without a hood, and how perfect she is, and how hot it is when she yells at me, and-'

Beast Boy stopped thinking as he noticed Raven blushing. 'Oh crap! I'm such an idiot!'

Raven stood up abruptly and left the room. Only the green boy noticed her leave.

"Wait, Rae..." she continued walking. "Yeah, real smooth, Gar."

He knew where she had gone - to the roof, her favorite meditation spot. He wanted to go and apologize to her before things could get any more awkward. A few minutes later, he decided to follow after her and go up onto the roof.

When he got up there, he saw Raven, floating over near the edge of the T. He could hear her quiet voice, repeating her mantra, and could feel the serenity. A breeze passed, and her hair blew in the wind. He tried to approach her, but he couldn't. She was too beautiful to disturb. He felt as if she was a butterfly; she would only fly away if he came too close, so he retreated into the tower once more.

Ever since then, he'd wanted to get closer to the demoness. To figure out what she hid in her mind. And for this changeling, any opportunity, even one that was completely stupid and reckless, was an opportunity nonetheless, and a risk he was willing to take.

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A/N: Sorry this got a little dramatic at the end. It'll get crazy again in the next chapters, but sometimes the drama just flows from my fingertips. I guess it can't be helped, lol.

Cyborg: R&R y'all!

Robin: I'm, too sexy for mah shirt, too sexy for mah shirt, so sexy it hurrrrrtsssss!

Starfire: Get to the doing of the reviewing and favoriting...if you please.

Beast Boy: I will get back with Terra if you don't R&R! I mean it!

Raven: ... ... ... SEXY RAIN DANCE! (/O-O)/ (-_-) (~o-o)~ ?(w?)

Malchior: I love it when you do that, babe...

Okay, okay, enough! Everybody leave now! this is a situation 3509! Who was in charge of watching Malchior? Who the HELL let him out? Please somebody, make sure he doesn't get anywhere near Raven...or Robin! Just - get him back in his plot cell.

I'm sorry you had to see that, guys, I really am...


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: Here's chapter 4 guys! I dont really know what to say, lol. Oh! Yeah, thanks for the reviews, and follows, and favorites, and for reading! I love you guys 3

Disclaimer: No...its not mah show...i wish it was, though :0 :3 just wait...you will be mine, Teen Titans! Mwahahahahahahahahahahaha!

Slade: You'll have to wait in line, sugar

Ummm...

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Chapter 4 - The Beginning of Something Ratchet, Part 2

Sighing, Beast Boy knew what he had to do. Taking the bucket of water in one hand, he started to walk towards the umbrella that hid the dark empath.

The others watched from a distance. Robin tried to stifle his laughter at the thought of what would happen. Cyborg and Starfire, on the other hand, were genuinely worried that they would never see Beast Boy again.

Beast Boy was now ten feet away from the girl, and he could see her form in the shade, lying down on her towel.

Eight feet away, his super sharp sense of hearing could pick up the soft sound of her breathing.

Five feet away, and he could see her lips silently tracing out the words on the page as she read. Her eyes moved from left to right, and she didn't even notice his presence.

Now he was right in front of her, and he sharply inhaled. She apparently heard him, because she suddenly looked up.

"Yes, Beast Boy?" she said with a strange tone in her voice. It almost sounded...playful?

The changeling bit his lower lip and raised the bucket. In one swift move, he sent the water flying straight into the empath's face.

Splash.

Garfield could've sworn that everyone could see his heart pounding in his chest from a mile away. All eyes were on Raven, waiting for her to respond. Beast Boy swallowed hard with the anticipation of a reaction. The bucket was still in his hand, which was clenched so tight, as if it was clinging to life itself.

Raven, who was completely soaked, slicked her purple hair back. Then, she slowly lifted her face in Beast Boy's direction. Everyone held their breath.

Then she laughed. It started out as a small chuckle; a giggle. Then it grew into and outrageous bout of laughter.

The changeling's eyes widened.

"Uh...you're not mad?"

"Of course not, silly! Heh heh you got me good!"

"Raven! Wake up! I think you're emoticlones are on the loose again," he said, throwing his hands - and the empty bucket - into the air. He dropped down under her umbrella and shook her by the shoulders. "Quick, we need to take a trip to Nevermore!"

Raven sat up and put a hand on Gar's shoulder. Then she surprised him once again by looking at him, almost...seductively?

"So, now you want to take another trip into my mind, boy?"

Beast Boy, who usually had a response for everything, was shocked out of his mind.

"I - i, um," was all he could manage.

Raven ran a finger down his chest. "I can't even imagine what else you want to do with me, Beast Boy. Or maybe I should just call you Beast," she said with a smirk.

Garfield turned into a tomato at these words, and pushed away from her quickly. He stood up again.

"Raven, what's going on with you today?"

"I don't know, but maybe you can come into my room, and then something will be 'going on' with me." Wink.

"Raven! Stop it! You're acting really weird! Did you see anything strange? Were you reading some kind of cursed book?"

"Awwww, you're concerned! That's so cute, Gar!"

"Seriously, Raven," he said, now really worried, "answer my question."

The empath pouted playfully. "Fine, Beasty. Yes, I was visited by a strange bunny. He made feel so much better!"

"What?"

"Hey! I know what this is! It was you in bunny form, and you put a little spell on me, and now you're trying to play dumb! Tell me, how did you learn magic? Have you been reading my books?"

Beast Boy blushed. He actually had been reading her books secretly, but not for that purpose. And a spell-casting bunny? Maybe Raven had just been doing some hard drugs. "N-no, of course not!" he forced out.

"Oh, so it wassss you, you naughty boy! You've been a bad, bad, Beast, haven't you?" she inquired as she slowly rose to see him face to face. She put her arms around his neck. "It's okay, I've been bad too. You can punish me la-"

"Whoopsgottago, itsureishotinhereisn'tit, haha!" Beast Boy said as he slipped away in the form of a seagull.

"Wait, come back!" Raven called as she reached out towards him. She accidentally threw herself off balance and fell to the ground with a, "Kya!"

In the distance, Cyborg, Robin, and Starfire stared unblinking at the scene that just unfolded. They watched a familiar, green bird fly in their direction. As he got closer, he morphed back into his human form.

"Dudes! There's something wrong with Raven!"

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A/N: Oooooh, somethin' cray cray is goin dowwwwn! Thanks for reading!

Titans: R&R!

Starfire: You are all my bumgorfs!

PS: Who else saw the latest episode of TTG!? idk about you, but i thought Meatball Party was the funniest episode yet!

PPS: I also just put up a one-shot called Nice to Know You, and its all dramatic and stuff! I'd highly appreciate it if you would check it out! :P


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: Here we go guys, chapter 5! Thanks for checking out the story, and reviewing, and all that good stuff! If i was Starfire, i wouldnt be able to stop floating, cuz im soooooo happy! (and its all thanks to you guys :3)

_**DISCLAIMER!**_ (see? its bold, underlined, italicized, annnnd its in all caps! that must mean im serious about not owning the Teen Titans)

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Chapter 5 - The End of the Beginning of Something Ratchet

"Dudes! There's something wrong with Raven!" said a confused and flustered Beast Boy, as he faced his friends.

Cyborg chuckled. "I don't know, BB, it looked like you two were getting along quite well!"

"No! This is serious! I think she's gone wonky in the head! She said something about a magical bunny putting a spell on her!"

"What?" Now Cyborg was confused.

Next to the robot, Starfire's eyes widened in shock.

"Oh no," said the alien girl, "this is most unfortunate."

"What is it, Star?" the Boy Wonder asked.

"I fear that something very terrible is happening; something that could possibly result in the chaos of Earth!"

Beast Boy stood up straight and flexed his scrawny arms. "I bet its nothing that Beast Boy and the Teen Titans can't handle with a little bit of," he chopped the air with his hand, "butt whoopin'!"

Robin glared at him. "We need to take this seriously, Beast Boy. Starfire is obviously worried about this."

"Yes, friend Robin is right. Something dangerous is doing the invading of the Earth, and life as we know it may be changed forever!"

Cyborg was curious. "What, exactly, are we dealing with?"

"Yeah, Star, what's invading us this time?" repeated Robin. "Aliens? Demons? Evil clowns?"

"We are being invaded by...the plot bunnies!"

*a sinister 'dun dun dunnnnnn' could be heard if you listened carefully*

"Oh, no, Star! You're on the shrooms too?" said the green changeling.

"Yeah, that's a little hard to believe, Starfire," said Cyborg. "I don't think bunnies can enslave a race. It's just not possible."

"Come on guys, give Star a chance! I mean, she never lies, right!" Robin said, defending the girl.

'That's what they are thinking,' thought Starfire to herself. 'Robin shall never even know that he is 'the hoe' and I am the 'pimp dad-die.'

"Uhhh, Star," said Beast Boy, waving his hand in front of her face, as she appeared to be in deep thought, "you still there?"

"Bumgorf!" was all she said.

Then, something seemed to catch Cyborg, Starfire, and Robin's attention, as they all stared past Beast Boy's shoulder.

"What? What are you guys lookin AT-!" he shrieked and jumped in surprise as he felt two hands firmly grasp his butt.

"Hey, Beasty," said Raven, still touching his butt and giving it a squeeze.

Beast Boy whipped around and pushed her hands away. "Stop it, stop it, stop it!"

Cyborg and Robin could do nothing to suppress their laughter. Starfire, on the other hand, looked frightened.

"Oh, X'hal," she said as the green boy and the dark girl continued to bicker in the background.

"Raven, everyone's seriously worried about you! Can't you do your Azarath thingy and turn normal again?"

"And why would I want to do that? I'm having so much fun like this!"

"You aren't taking this seriously," he argued, waving his hands as he spoke, "you could be in danger!"

She reached out and caressed his face. "I'll only be in danger if you want to play dangerous with me. I can get into the handcuff thing, too," she said with a flirtatious look in her eyes.

He shoved her hand away again. "Please stop touching me! You're making me uncomfortable, and everyone's already concerned enough!"

She disregarded his words and pulled him towards her. She smacked him on the butt. "Hey, I think you should just give up resisting me. It's kinda hot, but it's futile. I always get what I want, and pretty soon I'm gonna turn you into my Beast Bitc-"

"QUIET!" yelled the usually quiet alien girl.

Everyone stopped and turned to face her. Raven used this as a chance to sneak in another smack on Beast Boy's butt. He glared at her and quickly returned his focus to Starfire.

"Come, friends, we must return to the Tower at once. There is something I need to do the explaining about. We shall meet in the common room in one drakblerk-one hour."

The Titans sighed simultaneously and started walking back to the tower.

Beast Boy was the first to make it inside, because he had flown over in pterodactyl form. Everyone else had decided to walk, so the changeling figured that he had some time to be alone. Making his way to his room, he let his mind wander.

'This is really not good. What if old Raven never comes back? I liked old Raven. As a friend, of course, heheh. This Raven is scary!'

'Yeah, scary hot,' said another part of Beast Boys mind. 'We should just let her have her way with us!'

'Have what way with us? Ravens my friend, not a call girl! I would never even attempt to ruin our friendship by doing something like that!'

'What would be ruined? You know we dig her.'

'Yeah, of course, but you need to shut up and stop clouding my mind, negative self.'

Beast Boy made it to his room and walked in. He sat on the edge of his bed. Grabbing a nearby t-shirt, he pulled it over his head. He thought some more.

'Hey, when did I start having conversations with my own mind? Maybe I'm being influenced too much by Raven.'  
The changeling laid back and decided to take a short nap.

His nap was in fact, very short, as he was jolted awake by a familiar sound - the sound of a certain empath phasing through a portal.

"Raven! What are you doing in my room?!"

"Nothing, Beasty, it's just time to whip you to the point of submission and become your dominatrix," she said as she took of her cloak and cracked her whip.

"Huh?" was all he had time to get out as she tackled him and knocked him onto the floor. She smirked a tempting smirk, as Beast Boy struggled to get away from her. He finally managed to knock her off of him, and jumped back to his feet.

Backing away slowly as she walked slowly towards him, he almost made it to the door. Before he could escape, Raven jumped on him, slamming his back into the wall and busting a hole through it.

Beast Boy screamed.

"SHUT UP AND CALL ME MASTER!" Raven shouted as they both fell through the wall and into the hallway.  
Beast Boy somehow managed to wriggle away from the empath again, and he quickly bolted down the hall. He didn't stop until he reached the common room, where the rest of the team was waiting.

"HELP!" shouted the changeling, covered in asbestos - erm, plaster. His hair was sticking straight up and he was completely covered in white powder. His shirt looked like it went through a blender.

Cyborg and Robin laughed.

"Did you...did you...get...caught...by...Rae again?" Cyborg struggled to say.

"Looks like you...hehe...had a...a good time!"

They could not contain themselves.

"It's not funny," defended Garfield as he walked over and sat on the couch. Raven soon entered the room and sat next to him, much to his dismay.

'I'll get him later,' she thought.

Starfire began to speak. "Friends, I have gathered you here to tell you that something is obviously going wrong. We are being attacked by evil creatures from another planet, and they've already gotten friend Raven!

"A long time ago, a brave race of world dominators inhabited a planet known as Fluffilumptropolis, which was forged by their first ruler, Fluff. Since they've been around, their sole purpose in living was to create chaos on other planets in order to conquer them. This race was known as the plot bunnies.

"There is a record of them coming to Tamaran over a hundred years ago. The Tamaraneans succeeded in defeating them due to their strength in battle, but it was no easy task. It is said that they can cast a spell on you to change your character to the opposite of how you normally act. They call this the 'OOC Masquerade."

Beast Boy interrupted, "So that explains her," he said, pointing to Raven.

"Yes, that is what I believe. Each plot bunny adopts a personal mantra, which they use, much like Raven's powers. There is a way to reverse the curse," (heh, rhymes, heh),"but it is a secret I am not able to share.

"If they succeed in taking us over, mass confusion will occur, and Earth will ultimately perish. No one knows how many they sent, but even one plot bunny can prove to be a formidable foe."

"I still think Beasty put this spell on me," said Raven, running her hand down his arm. "I have a couple of fun spells we can play with tonight, if you want to."

"Cure her, please," the other Titans said in unison. Beast Boy scooted away from her, frightened.

"I will, but you must leave the room first."

They all did as she said and left hastily. All they heard was a scream, belonging to Raven, and the sound of electricity. Then Starfire called them back in.

"Well, that was fast," said Robin.

"Raven! Are you okay?" asked the changeling. She did look slightly more pale than usual.

"Yes, Beast Boy. But I had the strangest dream last night..." she trailed off as she saw her friends' grave faces. "It wasn't a dream, was it?"

Robin filled her in on the story. She left soon after, to meditate, apparently. The other teens soon retired to their rooms for the night, happy that the craziness was over for now.

Starfire got cozy in her bed, and almost drifted off to sleep. Suddenly she heard, almost in a whisper, "You is smart, you is kind, you is IMPORTANT!"

She was about to say thank you to the mysterious voice, but she realized what was happening just a second too late. Starfire passed out in her bed, knowing she would wake up completely different.

* * *

A/N: Raven's dilemma explained and solved! But whats gonna happen with Starfire?

Cyborg: Ya know the drill, guys - R&R!

Raven: Come here, Beasty Poo! I just shaved my legs, and I'm ready for a hot night!

Beast Boy: Starfire, didn't you cure her already?

Starfire: Yes, Friend Beast Boy, i have no idea what is wrong with her this time!

Raven: What's there to cure? It's just me, HAPPY!

Other Titans: Well THAT explains...

Happy Raven: Well, time's up! Back to Nevermore!

Normal Raven: Ow

Hope you guys liked it! BAII BAII! :3333333333333333333333333333333333333333333


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: Sorry for the wait guys; school started...ughhhh. Anyway, thanks for all the reviews, and views, and stuff. Hopefully I'll make it through this year...freshmen life, fml. And i have writer's block. Dammit. Meow. I love you all.

* * *

Chapter 6 - A Shocking Discovery

"No, no, no, this is bad," said a very flustered traffic light, entering the common room.

"Dude, what's wrong?" Beast Boy asked.

"Starfire's missing!"

"What? Are you sure? She was just here last night!"

Cyborg, who had been fidgeting around with his ear circuits, looked up. "WHAT? DID YOU SAY THAT STARFIRE'S PISSING? OKAY, TELL HER TO TAKE HER TIME!"

Beast Boy and Robin both covered their ears.

"What the hell?" Robin mouthed to the changeling.

"Accident with a screwdriver," he mouthed back, causing the boy wonder to cringe. "Let's get outta here and leave him alone..."

Cyborg lurched wildly as his head began spinning around. It lit up like a disco ball, and bad 80s music started playing. Robin and Beast Boy quickly fled the room.

"So, you're sure she's missing?"

"Yeah, the window was busted out and she wasn't in there!"

"Did you ask Raven if she saw her anywhere?"

"Beast Boy, I'm sure that Raven wants to rest," said Robin with a smirk. "If you want to go ask her, be my guest, but I won't be held responsible for the possible torture that she'll put you through."

"Fine," the changeling said, walking away from Robin and towards Raven's room, "I'll go."

Robin turned away and sighed. "So much paperwork I'll have to fill out. Some for his physical trauma, more for the rehab,"

"Shut up, traffic light!"

Robin laughed and walked away.

Beast Boy made it to the dark girl's door and knocked twice. There was no answer but the sound of mumbling. He pressed his ear to the door.

"Aaaah!" came a shrill cry from inside the room. Worried, Beast Boy opened the door and came in, only to see Raven standing in the opposite direction. Her hood was over her face, and she continued to mumble.

He took two steps closer.

"Uhhh...Rae?"

Suddenly, she turned around and glared at him.

"Beast Boy! Get out of here!" she shouted. She sounded more like she was trying to warn him, not like she was mad. Her eyes momentarily flashed red, and then returned to normal.

"I just wanted to ask if you've seen Starfire around here! What's wrong, Raven?"

"Nothing!" she shrieked, with a voice that sounded too high pitched. Then she coughed and lurched violently, losing control of her body.

"Raven?! What's going on?!"

She threw her hands up dramatically and smacked her butt. "DONTCHA WISH YO GIRLFRIEND WAS HAWT LIKE ME? DONTCHA WISH YO GIRLFRIEND WAS A FREAK LIKE ME? DONTCHA?!"

"Aaaaah!" Beast Boy exclaimed.

Raven snapped out of her trance. "Beast Boy, I told you to leave," she said calmly.

"What the hell was that Raven? I'm not leaving until you tell me what's wrong!"

Raven sighed. "Fine. Ever since Starfire cured me, I've been having OOC flashes. I went to Nevermore to seek advice from my emoticlones. Wisdom told me it was just a temporary side effect of the curse, and that I should be able to control the...urges. But now, my OOC side is a permanent part of my personality, even if I keep it hidden."

"What? This is bad, especially since Starfire's gone missing!"

"Starfire's gone missing?" Raven looked worried. "She's the only one with proper knowledge of the situation! What are we going to do in case of another attack?"

"I don't know!" Looking as if he was deep in thought, he added," Hey, Rae?"

"What?"

"What if they got Starfire? Maybe that's why she's gone."

Ravens eyes popped open. "You? Had an idea? That wasn't complete crap? Wow," she said, showing the slightest hint of a smile. The. Slightest. Hint.

"Score," he said quietly as he left her room.

"Excuse me?"

"Nothing," he replied mischievously. What Beast Boy couldn't see was Raven's unusually warm smile.

Behind her, a lamp exploded.

"Crap! I just bought that last week!" Raven sighed. "Back to the candles I suppose."

Back in the common room, Cyborg had finally fixed his ear and was talking to Robin about Starfire's disappearance. Beast Boy walked in and joined them.

"Guys!" shouted the green boy, "I think Starfire was attacked by a plot bunny!"

"Hold up, grass stain. Starfire knows the most about them. How could that be possible?"

"Yeah," added Robin, "don't you think she knows how to handle them?"

"Maybe that's the reason the attacked her! Now we have no way of saving ourselves!"

Robin pondered his thoughts. "Actually, you're right."

Cyborg chuckled. "That's a first."

Beast Boy smiled. "See? I've got brains too!" Suddenly, his smile fell. "But what now?"

"Yeah, we still don't know where Starfire is!" said Robin.

Raven appeared dramatically through a portal. "Then let's go find her." Then, she said something she'd secretly been wanting to say for a long, long time. "Titans, GO!"

Nobody responded. Robin glared.

Raven threw her hands up in defeat. "Hey, I had to do it someday."

Everybody shook their heads and walked slowly towards the exit.

"Thanks a lot, Raven," said Beast Boy solemnly.

"Yeah, Rae, you really know how to bring the party," added a sad-looking Cyborg.

"Let's go, team," said Robin.

Raven looked up at the ceiling. "What, so I can't even be spontaneous in a non-canonical story? Curse you! Azarath Metrion Zinthos!"

Ugutxjckhkhkhfxckjcjhchkvvhvh :+"+:(''+''&ggxjgckcjxxhxfkcjckvlhljbljvlblcjcjzhxxjvkvlvlv vblblvvlvhvvhvkvvkvkvkvkvlbchfsargshflhlhiatzzhvlj kgsttg ;() &8$$#%hgfulhlhlchxjvlblgdxvhjnlcxzyxghocshitfjcjvic

Aww crap! She broke my finger! I can do bad things to you, Raven, bad things!

*two minutes and a crap load of band-aids later*

They looked up, they looked down, they looked all around town. But nothing was there to be found, and the Titans wore frowns.

Where was their friend? Where could she be? And has Starfire, been turned OOC?

*pow, boom, smack!*

Shut the hell up and get back in your coffin, Dr. Seuss. Gosh, I'm never practicing necromancy again. Frikkin zombies.

"She's really gone," said Beast Boy. Raven smacked him on the back of the head, and pointed at Robin, who looked stuck between pissed off and depressed.

"Titans! Look harder! She has to be here somewhere!"

Raven put a hand on Robin's shoulder. She sensed his pain and confusion. "Robin, she's an alien princess, not a pair of sunglasses. She's not that hard to find. If she was here, we would've found her by now. C'mon, let's go home guys."

Robin kicked over a trash can as they walked back to the tower in frustration. He headed straight to his room and locked the door.

'I should've been watching out for her,' he thought. 'This is all my fault! I'm such an idiot! I should've known they would've attacked her next!'

His head sank into his hands. "What if...what if our Starfire is gone forever? What if she comes back unrecognizable?"

He was surprised by a knock on the door. He groaned, "Go away."

Knock, knock, knock.

"I said go away! I'm not in the-"

He stopped as Raven phased through his door.

"Not now, Raven."

She stood in front of him. "Robin, you know I wouldn't come in here to bother you. I came to help."

He sighed.

"I can literally feel your anger and sadness from my room, and its messing with my head. Let me ease your pain."

"I'm fine."

"Don't lie to me! It's no use anyway. Now, let me help."

"I can handle it!"

"Really? You can handle it? Just like you handled Slade? This isn't a game Robin, this is an invasion. We can't afford to have you go crazy again, not now. Now look at me."

"Go away, plea-"

"Look. At. Me."

Robin sighed again in defeat and turned towards the empath. She put a hand on his forehead and chanted, "Azarath, Metrion, Zinthos. Azarath, Metrion, Zinthos."

As she spoke, waves of his anger and sadness receded from his conscious. She could feel him ease up. He took a deep breath.

"Thanks, Raven."

"Robin, I've been inside your mind. Ever since then, I've felt connected to you, as if you were my brother. I'll do anything to help you."

He smiled. Randomly, the dark girl pulled the boy wonder into a warm hug. "Anything for my brother," she repeated. Then she pulled away. "And I was never here, and Rachel Roth never. gives. hugs. Now go to sleep." she said as she phased away.

'Azar,' she thought as she re-entered her dark room, 'that boy is hopeless.'

* * *

A/N: So there's the chapter, hope you liked it. I had to a have a little Rob/Rae friendship moments there, especially since i'm watching the series again, and i just saw "Haunted." Such a great episode!

R&R my peeps!


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: Hey guys! Who saw the new TTG! episode? It was a work of art! Look, even if you dont like the show, its a must-watch for any BBRae fan out there.

Anyway, thanks for all the support so far! Your reviews really make my day! Things are definitely getting cray cray up in dis place.

Here's chapter 7!

**Disclaimer:** Sorry guys...ain't nobody got time foh dat!

* * *

Chapter 7 - Booboo-Shaqueshia-Fire

Robin woke up with a start. "Starfire!" he shouted as he jumped up and flew from his bed - which was really a park bench.

"Ahhh! Where am I? I bet this is Slade's doing! I know he watches me as I sleep! And while I shower!" He rubbed the back of his head. "Or...maybe I was just sleepwalking again."

Two days had already passed since Starfire's disappearance, and Robin had become frantic again, looking for her. Sometimes he would even sleep-search for her.

The spazzy traffic light calmed down and checked himself to make sure he was okay. "No scars, no bruises..." he rolled up his tights. "Aha! What's that? Oh, that's the rash I got from Mad Mod..." Robin shuddered at the horrific memory.

He searched his belt, and was surprised to find a piece of paper crammed into one of the pockets. He opened it up. It read, "Come and watch the new episode of Jerry Springer live, featuring a very special - and smokin' hot - guest, Starfire! Tomorrow morning at 10!"

Robin's eyes bulged behind his mask. "Starfire!? Oh no! I gotta get to the Tower now!" Robin ran all the way home, and didn't even stop for ice cream.

Bursting through the common room door, he shouted, "TITANS-TURN-THE-CHANNEL, JERRY-SPRINGER-STARFIRE-TITANS-GO-GO-GO!"

The other Titans looked confused.

"Uhhhh..." said Cyborg.

"Go go Jerry Springer channel 11 titans go now move!"

Perplexed, Cyborg clicked the remote with his finger. Everyone else watched as the screen flipped to Jerry Springer's show. Jerry came down the pole as the crowd cheered.

"Thank you, thank you," he said, shaking their hands. "Today, we have a very special guest! A Teen Titan with some very adult drama! Give it up for the Tamaranean beauty, Starfire!"

The crowd went wild, and sure enough, out popped Starfire, wearing a...thong and some medical tape that barely covered anything.

"Hey boyyyyyyys," she said. "Who wants some of this cake cake cake cake cake cake cake cake cake cake!" She started twerking.

Raven spit out her herbal tea, and Cyborg started crying. Robin's nose was bleeding.

"Guys! Don't just sit there! We need to help her before anything else happens!" Beast Boy said. "Rae, can you teleport us there?"

"Yeah," she replied, snapping out of her trance, "Robin, are you okay?"

"Titans, go," he said softly, wiping his nose.

"Azarath Metrion Zinthos!" She and the team were engulfed in black, and teleported directly backstage.

"C'mon guys," said BB.

They walked towards the stage entrance, but were blocked by two massive, bald bouncers.

"You got a pass?" asked one with a scar above his eye.

"Noooo...but we're the Teen Titans! Isn't that enough to get us out there?" asked the green boy, with a signature eyebrow wiggle.

"No pass, no entry," said the other bouncer.

Robin whispered in Beast Boy's ear, "Let me handle this."

"Now," said Robin, "how about we make a little bargain." He placed a hand on the guard's shoulder. "You let us in, and I might let you touch a birdarang." He smirked, triumphantly.

"No pass, NO ENTRY!" the guard said with a glare.

"Let us through, dammit!" Robin shouted.

"ENOUGH!" shouted the bouncers simultaneously. Suddenly, they did a strange stance and tapped their fists together. "FUSHION HAH!" they shouted, creating a force field, and blowing the Titans away.

They groaned as they stood up.

"Okay, guys," said Robin, "one of us has to get us past them."

"No way dude," said BB.

"Ain't gonna happen," said Cy.

"Hell no," said Raven.

"Okayyyy..." said Robin, "I already tried and failed, so you three are gonna have to play rock paper scissors for it. Whoever wins has to do it, so try to lose, or something."

Sighing, the three played rock, paper, scissors. Raven won.

"Typical," she said.

"Okay, Raven, you have to do it."

"What am I supposed to say, anyway?"

"Ask nicely," said Cyborg.

"No way," said Beast Boy. "This is a job for...other Raven."

Raven looked at him fearfully. "Beast Boy, I don't think that's a good I-"

He cut her off. "You can do it, Rae, now go use your OOC charm and seduce the heck out of those bouncers!"

"I hate my life," she muttered while walking towards the bouncers.

The guards stood blocking the doorway. "No pass no entry."

Raven looked as if she was in deep thought. 'Come on, Raven, you can do this. Just let go of your personality, and...'

"Hey boys," said OOC Raven seductively, "do I really need a pass when I have this body?"

"No pass, no-"

"Dammit forget this crap!" she shouted as she engulfed the bouncers in black and smashed their heads were knocked out cold. She turned around to see the others with blank expressions. "Come on, let's get this over with," said normal Raven.

The Titans ran on stage, only to see Starfire and another ratchet girl fighting.

"He was mine first, you skank-ass slut!" shouted the ratchet hoe, who happened to be named Candie.

"Well, that's too bad, cuz he obviously chose me over you! Besides, you only been knowin Trey foh two weeks! He ain't love you, he just wanna put it in yo bootyhole!" said the alien girl - same voice as usual...just, not the same Starfire.

"Oooooooh," said the crowd.

Robin couldn't speak, so Cyborg said, "Starfire! Let's get out of here!"

She turned around. "Oh heyyyyy guyyyyys...and Robin." She glared at him. Then, her face was happy again when she looked at Cyborg.

"I guess I can come back, but let me cut dis hoe first. Oh, and I change-ded my name to Booboo-Shaqueshia-Fire, so y'all can call me dat from now on."

Raven's eyes popped open. "You what?"

"Yeah, my main hoe! It wuz gonna be chang-ded to Oh-Lawd-Jesus-Its-A-Fire, but that was taken. Da streets is tough, and Starfire wasn't cuttin it."

Raven didn't say anything, and Starfire returned to Candie. They were about to start fighting, but then Trey came out on stage. The crowd booed.

"Candie, baby, you know I love you baby! I would never do dat to you girl! Booboo is just a friend!"

"Shut up Trey!" screamed Candie. "That ain't what the couch would say!"

"Oooooooooohhhhhhhhhh," said the crowd.

Star, um, Booboo, got mad. "Trey! You is so petty! How da hell you gonna say we is just friends when you told me you love-ded me? Besides, you said you was single, anyway!"

"Ooooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh"

"What, Trey? You said you was single? Oh hell no! This fool met my daddy! He met. my. daddy!"

Trey backed up as Booboo and Candie approached him, both pissed. "Ladies, ladies..."

Candie growled and Booboo-Shaqueshia-Fire's eyes glowed green. Then they pounced on him.

All that was seen was a ball of bodies, dust, weave, and star- um- booboobolts. The Titans rushed over and tried to break up the fight. Jerry was last seen running away.

The fight went on for a good five minutes. The outcome was a knocked out Trey, Candie indented into a wall, and the other Titans struggling to drag Booboo away.

Robin handcuffed her, and Raven teleported them all back to the Tower.

Beast Boy sighed. "I...have a bad feeling about this."

Raven glared at him. "Yeah, a bad feeling that's late a few days," she said sarcastically.

"We're gonna have to keep you contained, erm...Booboo, until we can figure out how to fix this," said Robin.

"I'm grown! I can do what I want!" Booboo said, shaking her hair back and forth with attitude. "Whatever Robin, I am so over you! I thought you was gonna be my boo, but then I saw you in the shower, and it's not that big, so I was like, nah son, I needa get outta here, and like get a real man that can do things to my hot body, cuz I know you can't make me happy with that little French fry, ya feel me?"

Cyborg facepalmed. "Oh brother," he said as he dragged the handcuffed, kicking alien to the holding cell.

* * *

A/N: Hey again! Thanks for reading! It's funny, the idea of this fic actually came from me watching an episode of Maury, and it just made me think...what if i made a fic about Starfire being ratchet? So that's how i eventually came up with this whacknut idea.

Well, until next time.

Titans: R&R!

Booboo: FO SHIZZLE MAH NIZZLE!

Titans: ...

Raven: Touch me.


	8. Chapter 8

A/N: Heyyyyyyy y'alllllllll! Wazzup? LOL anyway, once again, thank you for all of the support and reviews (they make me feel all tingly inside). I'm always glad to see any kind of feedback, and to know your opinions 'n' stuff :3

PS: Did anyone see the VMAs last night? Miley Cyrus o-o [NO COMMENT]

Disclaimer: I'm DISCLAIMING it! (jk, i own it allllllllllllllllllllll) no, seriously, i dont own anything...

* * *

Chapter 8 - Plot Bunny Awareness Day

The day started off somewhat slow. Everyone woke up late, and nobody really had much energy left. Booboo was in the emergency holding cell they had specifically designed for a Tamaranean, still babbling about Robin's naked body and his physical shortcomings.

Last night, everyone had gotten sick of seeing her in a thong, so they had to hold her down to force on her normal clothes. She had fought hard to get them away from her, and had actually kicked Robin through a wall. She also complained that her normal clothes were not proper twerking material, and that she felt like an eight year old virgin again, which caused many eyebrows to rise. After many questions, all she said was, "Momma said I ain't no hoe. I still ain't no hoe." After that, they had decided to leave her alone, and turn in for the night.

This afternoon, everyone was in their usual spots. Robin was listening to music, Raven was reading, and Beast Boy and Cyborg were playing video games. In other words, it was boring and typical.

Robin groaned. "I'm going to check on her."

Raven looked at him. "You sure that's a good idea?"

"I need to see how she's doing."

"Whatever," she said, returning to her book.

Robin left the room and started off towards the holding place. He was met with the sight of Booboo napping peacefully on the floor. He tapped lightly on the glass.

"Booboo? Booboo, wake up!"

She snored.

Sighing, Robin opened the door and went over to tap her on the shoulder, when suddenly, Booboo shot up and bolted for the door.

"Tricked you fool!" she shouted as she locked the door behind her, trapping the Boy Wonder in the chamber.

He banged on the glass. "Let me out of here!"

"Boo you whore!"

With that, the alien girl left him.

Meanwhile, in the common room, the three Titans were engaged in an important conversation.

"Okay, look," said Cyborg, "since Star's out, we'll have to come up with a way to protect ourselves."

"You're right," added Raven, "we have to be as careful as possible."

Beast Boy spoke up. "Yeah, didn't Starfire say something about each plot bunny having an Azarack Metronome Zinocone...zino...zeen..."

"You mean a personal mantra? Yeah. Raven, you were attacked earlier. Do you remember what its mantra was?"

"Yeah...it was..."

"It was?"

She sighed. "You is smart, you is kind, you is important."

Beast Boy laughed. "You're joking!"

Raven glared at him. "I don't do funny."

"Whatever."

Cyborg rolled his eyes. "Okay, back to business. All we have to do is watch out for those words. Try to run away or cover your ears or something!"

"Rae-Rae," said Beast Boy, "can't you just do some kind of magic-y thing to keep us from being affected?"

"I can try to find something, but bunnies aren't exactly my specialty, Beast Boy."

"Well," said Cyborg, "At this point, anything is helpful. Maybe we'll find out how to get Starfire back to-"

At that moment, Booboo-Shaqueshia-Fire busted through the door, screaming, "Gotta get me some cold pop!"

Cyborg's head snapped in her direction. "What are you doing out of your cell, and where's Robin?"

She giggled. "I locked his sorry butt in the holding cell. Gotta a problem, yo?"

Cyborg said nothing and sighed. "I'll free him later."

It was going to be a lonnnng day.

* * *

Lord Dark Fluffb'all paced back and forth in front of Hop. "You have disappointed me, Hop! How could you let the pony fleet escape from you?"

"IT WASNT MY FAULT!"

"HOW DARE YOU YELL AT ME, YOU IMBECILE!"

"I'm sorry...my ship broke down unexpectedly!"

Lord Dark Fluffb'all glared. "That is no excuse! We were on the verge of conquering the Ponicorn Dominion, and because of you, our plans were compromised!"

"I'm sorry, my lord."

"Well, sorry doesn't cut it! You must learn that failure brings consequences. As punishment, I'm sending you to Earth. Maybe failures like you and Bun'nee can get along well."

"What?! You can't do this to me! I'm one of your-"

"I. Just. Did," he said as he clicked a button, sending Hop directly to Earth.

* * *

Bun'nee stayed hidden in a corner of the common room, silently monitoring the Titans.

"Seems like they're on to me. I have to be careful, wait to strike."

He slowly but surely snuck out into the hallway, looking over his shoulder. Not looking, he bumped into something fluffy. He looked up, only to see the bunny he hated most, Hop.

"Long time, no see, loser," he said.

"What are you doing here you dirty hairball?"

(This was actually considered a seriously offensive curse on Fluffilumptropolis.)

"Hey, that's not nice! Anyway, I just finished conquering the Ponicorn Dominion, and I just stopped by to help you out; you obviously need it," he lied.

"Whatever, just stay out of my way," said Bun'nee as he walked down the hall. Hop tailed him.

"Where are you anyway?"

He sighed. "Titans Tower, home of the most powerful teenage heroes (sorry Titans East), and I'm in the middle of taking them down."

"Oh," he said, unimpressed. "Where are you going now?"

"I'm going to attack the vulnerable one, Robin. And can you shut up?"

"Whatever."

Bun'nee and Hop made their way to the holding cell where Robin was trapped.

Robin ran to the edge of the cell upon seeing them. "Plot bunnies!" he shouted.

"So they already found you out?" Hop asked.

"It's not my fault! One of them's from Tamaran! Anyway, back to business. Well, well, well, what do we have here? The Boy Wonder, trapped in a cell!"

Hop looked at Bun'nee strange. "Are you trying to sound intimidating?"

Bun'nee glared. "What the fluff, Hop?! Can you not jack my swag?"

"What?" Robin inquired, confused.

"Ughh! Anyway, you is smart, you is-"

"Wait, wait, wait," interrupted Hop, "watch this!"

Hop raised his hands, err, paws, and shouted, "DRAW ME LIKE ONE OF YOUR FRENCH GIRLS!"

Suddenly, Robin grabbed his head in pain and screamed. He fell to his knees, and then fell unconscious.

"What did you do to him?"

"It's a new little trick I learned on a Ponicorn moon - it takes a few hours to be complete, but its effects are drastic. They call it...the gender-bend. Mwahahahaha!"

* * *

A/N: Hey y'all again! Thanks for reading my crazy story! Me wuvvz you \(3-3)/ hugs for all and all for hugs!

Also, please rate and review, and follow, and favorite, and hug me back :33333333

Raven: I love you.

Beast Boy: Me too, Rae!

Raven: I was talking to Princess Celestia...

BB: Oh...


	9. Chapter 9

A/N: Yo, yo, yo! I'm back! not that i was gone...anyway, once again, thanks for all the love and support y'allz! Here's chapter 9...i hope it's good; i had to force myself to write it through severe writers block!

Disclaimer: meh

* * *

Chapter 9 – Birdy Girl!

The next day, Robin woke up on the cold floor of the Tamaranean holding cell, feeling slightly odd. He had a terrible headache, like a pulsing, throbbing pain. Groaning, the Boy Wonder struggled to stand up. When he finally got to his feet, he noticed a certain heaviness on his chest.

"What?" he muttered groggily as he looked down, only to see two big, giant, bouncing…boobies?

"Aaaaaaaaaaaagh!" he screamed with a feminine voice as he ran to the side of the glass to see his reflection. Yes, he was now boobilicious (and he had a little junk in the trunk, too), with a perfect hourglass body. (Watch out, Starfire and Raven). He also noticed that his hair was straight, and hung down to his shoulders. Well, I guess we can't call him 'he' anymore…well; there's only one more way to know if he's truly changed.

Robin stuck his hand down his spandex pants, and…nope, it wasn't there!

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagh!" he exclaimed, and once again, fell unconscious.

* * *

It was morning in Titans Tower, and once again, they resumed their daily monotony, with the exception of Booboo-Shaqueshia-Fire, who was intent on causing trouble. In only two hours, she had twerked on Cyborg, attempted to stick her hand down Beast Boy's pants while forcing him to eat fried chicken, motorboated Raven (lmao I had to), and tried to put Silkie in the toaster. Now, she was licking the rug.

"Booboo!" Cyborg shouted. "Can you calm down already?"

Booboo stuck up her middle finger.

"Hey, y'all, that's just mean."

"Whatever," she said, "I do it to bird brain all the time."

Cyborg's eyes popped open. "Aw, man! I left Robin in the containment chamber! Crap!" He got up and rushed into the hallway as Booboo laughed hysterically in the background.

As he approached the holding cell, he looked inside to see a sleeping girl on the floor, in Robin's clothes. Puzzled, he muttered a, "what the hell?" and walked closer to the glass. He opened the door and stepped inside to get a closer look at the sleeping girl.

"Well, she does kinda look like Robin…" he sniffed, "and she definitely smells like him. I'm gonna need a DNA sample."

Sighing, he crouched down and was about to yank out a lock of hair, when suddenly, the girl grabbed him by the wrist and flipped him over onto the ground.

"Yep, you're definitely Robin."

"Sorry, Cyborg, you startled me," she said intensely, just like normal Robin would.

Girl Robin helped him to his feet. "But your hair, your voice, and those boobs – I mean – your body! What happened to you?"

"Damned plot bunnies got me. Apparently one of them learned a new trick. I just got - what'd he call it? - genderbent."

Cyborg struggled to stifle his laughter. "Well," he said with a smirk, "even though Robin is already a girly name, I think a name change is in order!"

"Cyborg, now is not the time to be thinking about something so -"

"I know! I think I have the perfect name for you!"

"And what could that be?"

"Oh, you'll see soon enough…"

The two walked on in silence towards the common room, where the other Titans were. Upon entering, they were met with the horrible sight of Booboo chasing a very nude Beast Boy around the room, and a frightened Raven hiding behind the couch.

"Imma only give you yo' pants back if you let me touch it, Beast Byatch!"

"Get away, get away, get away!"

"Let me see yo beast!"

"Never!"

"I need to know is it bigger than bird brain's!"

"Azarathmetrionzinthosazarathmetrionzinthosazarath metrionzinthos."

Cyborg, recovering from his shock, cleared his throat loudly. "AHEM!"

Everyone stopped and looked towards him, and to the sexy girl standing next to him.

"Who's your lady friend?" asked Beast Boy. "And why is she dressed like Robin?"

"That IS Robin, dipwad," said Raven.

"See," said Cyborg, "she caught on already. But her name isn't Robin anymore. It's…Birdy Girl!"

Birdy Girl glared at Cyborg. "Like hell it is! No way are you going to call me Birdy Girl!"

"I don't know dude, I kinda like it!" Beast Boy said.

"I concur," said Raven.

"Birdy Girl? Haha, more like Birdy Slut!" Booboo added.

Birdy Girl frowned. "I hate everyone." She walked away.

"Now she's sounding like Raven," said Beast Boy.

"You are a nuisance," Raven said, and got up. "I'm going to search for curse reversal spells." She walked away.

Beast Boy looked at Booboo, who was slowly inching closer and closer to him, and back to Raven, who was walking away. Then he bolted towards the empath. "Hey, wait up!"

"Imma see it whether you like it or not!" shouted Booboo in the distance.

Cyborg just shook his head.

* * *

Catching up to Raven, Beast Boy grabbed her shoulder. "You can't leave me with Booboo! She freaks me out….plus, I…"

"What?"

"I'm scared of the plot bunnies…"

"You can turn into any animal, but you're scared of a little plot bunny? Wow."

Raven opened the door to her room, walked in, and shut the door behind her.

Knock. Knock. Knock.

She opened the door again. "What?"

"I'm serious…"

"Fine, whatever, just…put some clothes on," she said with a slight blush. She summoned a pair of shorts from his room for him to wear.

"Thanks," he said, putting them on, "but where's my shirt?"

"Oops, um, couldn't find it!" said Raven as something blew up in the background. 'He doesn't need a shirt…heheheh…' she thought. 'Wait…that's not right…whatever…'

Beast Boy entered her room. "So, how can I help?"

"Well…you can sit on my bed and not touch anything. Otherwise, you'll have to – cue dramatic sound effect – read books!"

He sighed. "Fine, I'll just sit, like another one of your statues."

Raven rolled her eyes, and began searching through her books.

"Meow," purred a green kitten behind her.

Raven turned around to face him. Suddenly, she dropped her books, went over to the kitten, and picked him up. He purred curiously as she petted him.

Beast Boy morphed out of kitten form and stood facing Raven. Then, he pulled her into a warm hug. Blushing, she returned the hug.

'He feels even hotter than he looks,' thought a voice in the back of Raven's head.

'What?' normal Raven thought back.

'All we have to do is take off his pants…'

'I can't do that!'

'No, but I can…'

Raven groaned.

"You okay, Rae?"

"I'm fine, Beast Boy…"

"Hey, Raven?"

"What is it?"

"Why are we hugging, in the first place?"

"I don't know, but don't ruin it."

* * *

A/N: Okay, the whole hugging thing was a little cheesy, but just bare with me, m'kay? Please comment, thumbs up, or leave a video response - oops, wrong website! plz R&R and favorite, and follow, and all that jazz if you please! Love you guys!

Raven: Draw me like one of your French girls...

Beast Boy: Really?

Raven: You go, glen coco

Booboo: AND WE CAAAANT STOPPPP, AND WE WOOONT STOPPPPP, CANT YOU SEE ITZ WE WHO OWN DA NIGHT, CANT YOU SEE ITZ WE WHO BOUT DAT LIFE? AND WE CAAAAANT STOPPPPP, AND WE WONNNT STOPPP, WE RUN THINGS, THINGS DONT RUN WE! WE DONT TAKE NOTHING FROM NOBODY!

Beast Boy:...

Raven: Twerk

Me: wtf did i drink tonight?


	10. Chapter 10

A/N: Okay guys, I'm sorry it took me so long to update; still getting used to my new school schedule. I also had no idea what to write, (curse you, writer's block) so this chapter's kinda short. Fear not, by next chapter, hopefully I'll have a little more...inspiration. On the awesome side, I got a laptop! So...yeah, no more cray cray writing on mobile, emailing it to myself, copying and pasting it to Word, then editing it, then uploading it to Fanfiction, then editing it some more, then posting it -_-

Anywho, thanks for sticking with me so far. I honestly didn't expect anyone to like this story, so, you guys are awesome. Also, thanks for reviewing and following, i love to hear what you guys have to say!

Disclaimer: meh...and mah again...

* * *

Chapter 10 - The Discussion

Raven woke up late the next morning. After Beast Boy left last night, she tired herself out trying to find any spells that might be of use. Of course, she came up with nothing, and fell asleep under a pile of ancient books.

Slowly, she stood up and stretched her limbs, recovering from the awkward position she had been sleeping in. She wanted to continue her search for spells, but she noticed her growling stomach.

She sighed. "Great. More exposure to the outside world."

Pulling on her cloak, she phased through a portal and into the common room. The only person there was Cyborg.

"Hey, Rae," he called from the couch.

"Where is everyone?" she asked.

"Don't know; probably in their rooms."

"Thank Azar...you're the only one with any sense around here these days." She floated into the kitchen and grabbed some cereal. Bringing the bowl with her to the couch, she sat down next to Cyborg and ate silently. He looked over at her.

"Raven," he said, "I've got a question for you."

"Hmmm..."

"I was running some tests yesterday to predict what each of us would become like if we were attacked by a plot bunny..."

"And..."

"Well, I first ran tests for Starfire, even though she was already changed. Normally, she's nice, polite, and naive. So, naturally, ooc Starfire should be rude, street smart, and crazy, which she is now. Then, I calculated Robin's possibilities. If he hadn't been genderbent, he would've become lazy, uncaring, and...mean, especially to Star."

"Okay...where's this all going?"

"Well, judging by the accuracy of Star's test, I decided to run a test for you, out of curiosity, even though you're already cured...and I found something."

Raven looked at him cautiously, slowly placing her cereal bowl on the table. "Cyborg, what did you find?" she asked tensely.

"Normally, you're calm, collected, introverted, and stoic, yet you care for us like family. When you were turned, you became really...open, and seductive. Especially toward Beast Boy. Actually, only towards BB, which, I'm trying to forget, by the way. And you were just, unnaturally strange."

Raven blushed. "So..."

"That's not what the machine calculated. You should've become a loyal servant to your father, and attempt to destroy us all."

"Well, it's a good thing that I didn't, right?"

"Yeah, but it's still strange that the calculations were wrong, so I decided to run a few more tests on your DNA...and I found that you demon blood was actually immune to the ooc spell in the first place."

"What?"

"Yeah, it seems as if your situation was triggered by something else entirely...like, fear."

"Fear of what?"

"I don't know. Unless you're afraid of bunnies, I have no clue what might've triggered your sudden change."

Raven said nothing.

"Oh no, Rae, don't tell me you're actually afraid of bunnies..."

"It's not my fault, okay! Nobody knows what I've been through!"

"Hey," he chuckled softly, "our secret. But that's not the problem. My question is, why did you become like that? Since you weren't actually turned ooc by the spell, that side of you was already a part of your personality. But where have you been hiding that?"

"I don't know! I've never felt anything like that, not even in Nevermore!"

"Well, maybe it's time you take another trip to Nevermore, to find some answers."

"That still doesn't explain why Starfire was able to cure me."

"Since your fear was caused by the plot bunny, it worked. Or, your mind could've just been tricked into thinking you were cured, and that side of you just receded."

"This is insane..."

"Everything's insane."

"Cyborg, I have a question for you too."

"What is it?"

"Just...out of curiosity, what would Beast Boy become? If he was turned..."

"Why? Concerned for grass stain now, are we?"

"Anyone ever tell you that you shouldn't answer a question with a question?"

"Okay, okay, I get it. If he gets attacked, he'll become smart, cynical, sarcastic..."

"Hmmmm..."

"What?"

"Nothing," she said, standing up to leave. "I need to go to Nevermore." She phased through the floor.

Cyborg sighed. "And she didn't even put her bowl in the sink...sheesh."

He stood to walk over and wash the dishes. "At the end of the day, I'm the one left with all the responsibility on his shoulders...hopefully, Raven can figure this out, and things can go back to normal. I'm just glad she didn't ask what my test results were...I never want to turn into that..."

Behind him, the door popped open to reveal Booboo and Birdy Girl struggling to get in the door.

"Booboo," the traffic light shouted, "get out of my way NOW!"

"Nuh-uh! You get yo ass outta my way now!"

As they both struggled to get through the door, the two heroes fumed at each other. Cyborg shook his head in shame, and walked away through a different door.

"Ain't nobody got time foh dat..."

* * *

A/N: Hey again guys! Thanks for reading this chapter; i know it wasn't as funny as the others, but the humor shall return if my name isn't Jean ValJean...lol jk, but yeah, more humor and ooc-ness coming your way. And as always, please R&R, i really appreciate you guys taking your time to comment! Once again, love you guys, goodnight, and big balls.


	11. Chapter 11

A/N: hey guys! not much to say but thanks a whole bunch, for everything! here's chapter 11...

Disclaimer: DAT IS NAWT MAH JAAAAAHB!

* * *

Chapter 11 – Somethin' in Nevermore

Raven held up the sacred mirror in front of her face. "Azarath Metrion Zinthos!" she shouted, and was instantly sucked into the portal.

On the other side of the portal, she saw the familiar, dark world that housed her emotions. She stood on the rocky pathway, and looked towards the many archways.

"Gotta find Wisdom…" she muttered. Raven walked through an arch. The world suddenly switched to a happy place, full of ponies, marshmallows, and kittens. In the distance, she saw a pink-cloaked figure bounding towards her on a giant unicorn. "Oh, brother…"

"HEYYYYYYYY RAE-RAE!" shouted the happy pink Raven. She leaped off of the giant unicorn and landed right on top of Raven, knocking her over. "I MISSED YOU SOOOO MUCH, GIRRRRRL! HOW'S EVERYTHING? OH RIGHT, I'M YOU, I ALREADY KNOW! OMG OMG OMG BB IS SOOOOOOO HAWTTTTTTT!"

Raven blasted Happy away from her with a dark blast of energy. "STOP YELLING!"

"Ouch, Rae-Rae, that hurt!" said the pink girl, pouting.

"I'm sorry, Happy, but I don't have time for any of this. I need to find Wisdom."

"Well, if you want to find her, good luck. I have no clue where she is! I've been looking for her, so she can help me with my homework, and she wasn't in the library! Like, how can you just bail on me like that, you know?"

"Wait, wait, wait, you have to do _homework?_ Since when?"

"Ugh, there's some new chick here, and she keeps changing the rules! She stinks!"

"Who is she? Where can I find her?"

Happy threw up her hands. "I don't know! Go find Wisdom if you wanna play 20 questions, sheesh!"

"Okay, no need to be so rude, Happy…I was just asking a question…"

"OMG OMG OMG IT HAPPENED AGAIN!"

Raven was now utterly confused. "What?"

"I keep randomly popping in and out of character!"

"What?!"

"I'm sorry, Raven, but I have to go!" Abruptly, Happy jumped onto the unicorn and galloped away, leaving Raven behind.

"What is going on?"

The confused girl walked into another portal. What she saw was even more confusing – Rude, Brave, and Love were wearing leather jackets and talking to bikers in a bar. She couldn't do anything but stare, open-mouthed.

"Hey, look who just walked in! It's Raven!" shouted Brave. The others looked at Raven. "Say hello, boys!"

Raven looked over at the bikers. They waved. Raven looked back at Brave. "What the hell is this? Who are these guys? And what are _you_ doing here, Love?"

"Oh, these guys? This is Ricardo, Eduardo, and Killslice. And Love is a big girl – she can do whatever she wants!"

Raven raised an eyebrow at Love.

"What? I've always wanted to live life on the wild side…meow…" She leaned over and gave Eduardo a kiss. Raven cringed.

"Okay, I'm never gonna be able to un-see that," she said, shaking her head. "And sorry, guys, but those three have to leave. This is a place for me and my emotions…not for bikers."

Ricardo, Eduardo, and Killslice all pouted. "Aww, man…" they said simultaneously.

"Oh, shaddup and grow some muscle!" Rude shouted. "Or I'll never sleep with you again!"

Brave smirked and punched Rude in the shoulder. "Get 'em, girl!"

"Oooo, kill 'em," said Love.

"What did you say?!" shouted Raven.

Killslice raised his hand shyly, like a young school boy.

Raven called him impatiently. "Yes?"

"We banged."

"Okay, okay, out, NOW!" she yelled. The three bikers left the room, and stepped through the portal. Raven could've sworn she heard Happy's voice saying, "Heyyy, you big, strong men," but she brushed off the thought.

"Rude, Love, Brave," she said through clenched teeth, "what's going on here?"

"Look, Raven, you can't boss us around anymore. The new boss is in charge, and she's changed all the rules. Plus, there's boys now!"

"Who is this new girl anyway? And where is Wisdom?!"

Love smirked. "It's a secret…"

"I swear if you don't answer, I will put you in a lemon."

Love's face brightened.

"With Mas y Menos."

Love started to sob uncontrollably. "You're….you're evil..."

"Same goes for you two, Brave and Rude."

"Personally," said Rude, "I wouldn't mi-,"

"The new girl calls herself Nega-Raven…and she's captured Wisdom. If you want to find her, you'll have to go to…that place…"

"Thanks, Brave. I'm going to make sense of this crap."

Raven turned and walked through yet another portal. She was now back in the creepy part of Nevermore, and she saw the place she was all too familiar with. "The cave…the pathway…to Azarath."

Raven entered the cave, expecting to appear in a white city, the place where she grew up, but instead, she appeared in a seemingly normal, suburban cul-de-sac.

"What the hell?"

She looked around at the beautiful houses, and one in particular caught her eye. While all the other houses were a pale yellow, this house was sky blue…and covered in toilet paper.

"WHATCHU' DOIN, STARIN' AT MAH HOUSE, HONEY BOOBOO CHILLLLLD?!"

Raven's head whipped around seconds before a pudgy little hillbilly girl jumped on her and tackled her to the ground. The girl started to pull Raven's hair with one hand, and threatened to spray tan her with the other.

Finally, after too many precious minutes of struggling, Raven freed herself from the young girl's death grip.

"Who are you, and what are you doing in my head?!"

"Me? Oh, I'm Nega-Raven!"

* * *

_Meanwhile…_

Cyborg sat on the couch next to Beast Boy. They were engrossed completely in a racing game. Beast Boy was losing, because it's fun to mess up Beast Boy's life for some reason. (Sorry, Greg Cipes)

"BOOYAH!"

"No fair, you totally cheated!"

"Talent, baby, talent!"

"Whatever…" Beast Boy stood up and stretched. "I'm gonna go grab some sodas, okay?"

"Sure, get me a diet Batman with a side of Wonder Woman."

"What?"

"What?

"What did you say, Cyborg?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean what did you ask me for?"

"A Coke, like always…" Cyborg scratched the back of his head. "Are you okay, BB?"

Beast Boy scratched his own head. "Yeah, I'm fine…"

He walked into the kitchen and opened the fridge. "Awwww, dude! Did you drink all the soda again?"

"Oops! And guess whose turn it is to go shopping!"

"I don't know why I put up with this…this animal cruelty…" Beast Boy morphed into a dog and whimpered, then left for the store.

Cyborg leaned back and relaxed. "Ahhhh…quiet…"

"Not for long, tin can!" shouted Bun'nee.

Cyborg jumped up and prepared his rocket arm. "You! Leave the Tower, or you're gonna get it furball!"

Bun'nee hopped backwards. "Gasp! Egad! Hiss! How dare you speak to me in such a way! You're gonna pay for that!"

He waved his hands (paws) in the air, and started to chant, "You is smart, you is kind, you is IMPORTANT!"

A whirlwind of power and magic swirled towards Cyborg, and he shot his laser at it. He struggled to overpower Bun'nee's blast with his own. They both screamed, and their equal strength caused a giant explosion, knocking the two back into the walls, unconscious.

In the distance, one could hear Vegeta sneeze loudly.

* * *

A/N: hey again guys! once again, thanks for reading 'n' stuff! will update soon (if i'm not swamped with h/w) Love you guys!


	12. Chapter 12

A/N: Hey guys! I know it's been quite a while since my last update (sorry bout that), so I made this chapter extra long for you guys. It's almost like a double chapter, :p so, anyway, thanks for sticking with me so far! I have so much fun writing this! But...highschool hates me, and doesn't want me to update...so, boo you, highschool! Hopefully, HOPEFULLY, (and I mean I _really _hope so) I can figure out an updating schedule. But until then, updates might be scattered...so, anyway, here's chapter 12! Hope you like it! (I made it with love)

Disclaimer: I don't own the Teen Titans.

* * *

Chapter 12 – Oh, Tin Can

Birdy Girl woke up early in the morning. She hopped out of bed, full of energy, and threw on her traditional red, green, and yellow costume. Bright and wide-eyed, she strolled out of her cozy room and straight into the common room, awaiting her quiet breakfast by the window.

"Ahhh, it's good to be me," she said happily. Birdy had finally gotten used to being a girl, and was actually starting to like it. (Don't worry Birdy, you'll regret it in a month.)

The Girl Wonder walked into the kitchen, grabbed a bowl of Batty-O's, and then sat down on the couch. She smiled sweetly as she took a big spoonful. "Mmmmmmh, these taste just like Bruce…"

"I know honey, he tastes just like chocolate!"

Birdy Girl jumped up and threw her cereal bowl onto the table. "Who said that?! Slade, treachery, INSURRECTION!"

"It was me, silly!" said a familiar voice.

She continued to look around frantically. "Cyborg? Is that you? Where are you?"

Cyborg's disembodied voice giggled, but did not reply.

"Cyborg? Did you just…giggle?"

No response.

Slowly and warily, Birdy Girl sat back down and continued to eat her cereal. Then, out of the corner of her eye, she spotted a strange piece of trash on the table.

"Hey, who left this tin can on the table?" She picked up the tin can. "It was probably Beast Boy; I'll have to remember to crack out my whip and stun gun. Naughty boys must be punished – that's what Bruce would say to me every time I-,"

"Oooooooh, somebody sounds like they were a little Dirty Birdy," said the voice again.

"Cyborg, this isn't funny! Where are you hiding?"

Cyborg sighed. "I'm insulted. You don't even notice you have your hands all over me…"

Birdy Girl looked at her hands. The only thing she was holding was the…tin can…

"Cyborg? Is that you?"

"Yes," replied the tin can, whose lid flapped up and down as it spoke, "it's me, Cyborg. And your hands are all over my hot metal body."

Birdy Girl shrieked and threw the tin can onto the couch. "Eww…"

"Hey, you're already getting rough, and you haven't even bought me a drink yet! Where are your manners?"

"Cyborg, what happened to you? How did you turn into a tin can?"

"The nice bunny visited me and gave me this hot bod! You want me, don't you, Birdy Girl?"

The curvy traffic light gagged. "No….no…no, no, no, no, no…"

"Calm down, I'm only teasing. Besides, I'm not into girls. Sure, I would've taken you DOWN if you were still the hunk you used to be, but now I'm only interested in the sexy Beast down the hall."

Birdy Girl stared blankly at Cyborg. "OH GAWD MY VIRGIN EARS ARE BLEEDING!" she shouted, and ran away.

Cyborg used his magical tin can eyes to stare in the direction Birdy Girl took off in. "Well, I guess she doesn't like having fun…whatever." The tin can sprouted two scrawny legs and hopped off the couch. "Now where was that Victoria's Secret lip gloss I bought last night? I need to look sexy for my green man…"

Cyborg farted sparkles.

* * *

Beast Boy yawned as he limped tiredly through the hallway. His stomach grumbled loudly. "Calm down, boy," he said, "I'm gonna feed you as soon as I make it into the kitchen."

Suddenly, something rammed into the green boy, knocking him over. He landed on top of something, and his hand felt something soft and squishy.

"Aaaaaaaaaaaah!" shrieked the object.

"Huh?" Beast Boy mumbled as he looked down and his eyes came into focus. What he landed on was none other than Birdy Girl. "Birdy Girl?! I'm so sorry!"

Birdy Girl glared. "You can be sorrier _after_ you get your dirty green hand off my tit!"

"What?" Beast Boy noticed the position of his hand. "Oh! Oops!" he quickly morphed himself into a bird, and flew away from her. "Sorry about that…" he said, dropping back to the ground. (future yaoi, anyone? jk lol)

Birdy Girl stood. "No, no, it's my fault for running through the hallway like a maniac. Anyway, what has you up so early today, Beast Boy?"

"I'm just gonna grab some food. I'm starving and I just depleted my chip stash last night."

Birdy Girl's eyes popped open. "Oh, you don't wanna go in there, man."

"Why? What happened?"

"Cyborg happened. Cyborg. Happened."

"Okay…I'm confused…"

Birdy Girl shook her head slowly. "I don't want to talk about it," she muttered. The girl turned around and began to walk away, murmuring quietly. "I'm in my happy place, I'm in my happy place, Bruce. Can you see me? This is the happy place, and you're here too. And so is Batgirl, and the Joker, and all of my wonderful friends…"

Beast Boy stared after her. (He swore he wasn't looking at her ass.) 'Wonder what's wrong with her…must be girl problems.' He shrugged and continued walking towards the common room doors.

Entering the room, Beast Boy rushed straight for the kitchen area. He opened the fridge to find his delicious box of tofu. "Tofu, tofu, gonna eat me some tofu," he sang. As he turned around, he noticed that the microwave was turned on.

"And I thought I was irresponsible. Sheesh." He went over to turn off the microwave, and noticed there was…a tin can inside. "What the hell? Is someone trying to blow up the whole freakin' tower?!"

"Oh, yes! Yessssss! Heat me up, microwave! Electrify my hot body!"

"Is that…Cyborg?" he asked, recognizing his friend's voice. Perplexed, he opened the microwave and took the tin can out, then replaced it with his leftover tofu. 'He must be trying to prank me again. Not gonna happen, dude, not gonna happen.'

"Hey! What's the matter with you? Can't you see I'm trying to get all hot for you?"

"What?" he looked down at the tin can in his hand. "Oh…I see! Cyborg must've put a microphone in here. Let me just check…"

Beast Boy opened the flap on the tin can and looked inside. "Hmm, no microphone…"

"Hey," flapped the tin can, "I didn't know you wanted to start off like that…but I guess we can, Beasty."

"Nice try Cyborg! A robotic tin can won't fool me! I know you're hiding somewhere around here!" Beast Boy threw the tin can down and began to search for Cyborg.

"Ugh…he's such an idiot…yet, so sexy you are, my love," he muttered. "Well, I guess if he doesn't want me, I have to booty call…now where did I hide Mas y Menos' numbers?"

Once again, he sprouted legs and waddled back in the direction of his room. "Better take the short cut…" Cyborg the Tin Can farted sparkles once again, and disappeared in a bright pink teleportation cloud.

Beast Boy, on the other hand, continued to look for his friend. "Come out, come out, wherever you are!" Of course, he didn't find him…what an idiot. (Sorry, Greg Cipes)

"Of course!" shouted Beast Boy. "He's probably in his room!"

Stupidly, Beast Boy bolted off in the direction of Cyborg's room, forgetting to take his tofu out of the microwave. Boy, is that gonna bite him in the ass…

* * *

Booboo-Shaqueshia-Fire pranced ghetto-ly into the kitchen to make herself some fried chicken. "Gold all in my chain, gold all in my rang, gold all in my watch, don't belieeeeve me jus' watch, don't believe me just watch," she rapped serenely, walking towards the microwave with a cold piece of fried chicken in her hand.

"Bands a' make her dance, bands a' make her dance…" She opened the microwave, only to have Beast Boy's unattended tofu unexpectedly blow up in her face. "WHAT IN THE NAME OF WAKA FLAKA AND BOOTYHOLE JUST HAPPENED?!"

Pissed as hell, Booboo wiped the disgusting mush off of her face. She sighed. "Not the first time that's happened…now I gotta get a new weave. Oh well, it can't be helped homies…"

Shoving the cold fried chicken in her mouth, Booboo reached into her bra to pull out her emergency weave money. "Hey! Ain't nothin' in here! Wher' da hell my weave money is?!"

She checked to see if she had moved it into her boot. "It ain't in here either!" She flipped her tofu covered hair indignantly. "This fool is boutta pay for my weave! He gon' get it!"

She stormed off into the direction of Beast Boy's room. "BEAST BYATCH? WHERE ARE YOU FOOL? YOU IS BOUTTA PAY FO' MY WEAVE, OR WE IS GONNA HAVE PROBLEMS UP IN THIS PLACE!"

As she angrily stomped down the hall, she passed by Birdy Girl's room, and decided to double back. Sneakily, she peeped in through the hole on the door. What she saw was something so horrible, so inhumane, so crazy – she couldn't wait to call up all her friends and tell them. Birdy Girl was humping a pillow and muttering strangely, "Who's the girl now, huh? WHO?!"

Booboo stepped back in shock and giggled. Then she remembered that she was supposed to be angry. 'Oh yeah, I'm on my way to shank a hoe. Ain't nobody got time fo' laughin.'

She continued down the hallway, but heard voices as she passed by Cyborg's room.

"Cyborg," said Beast Boy's voice, "I know you're in here! You can't hide forever bro!"

"I'm right here, you sexy idiot!" replied Cyborg's voice. Booboo raised an eyebrow and moved closer to the door.

"Yeah right, there's no way you can be a tin can!"

Wanting an answer to the nonsense, and not willing to hold off her anger any longer, the tofu-covered alien girl kicked the door down. "BEAST BOY!? YOU IS IN BIG TROUBLE YO! YOU IS PAYIN' FOR MY WEAVE, OR U IS GONNA DIE!"

Beast Boy looked over at Booboo in confusion, and Cyborg turned his 'hot' tin can body in her direction.

"What'd I do?" asked Beast Boy.

"You left tofu in the microwave and it exploded all over my -," she stopped and stared at the tin can on top of Cyborg's bed. "What the hell? Is you talking to a tin can? Wow, maybe you don't need to pay for this weave, if you is that crazy…"

The tin can waved his puny metal hand at Booboo. "Booboo, it's me – Cyborg."

Booboo scratched her head. "Let me guess – plot bunny?"

"Yep…" he replied, farting more sparkles.

Booboo snickered. "You got turn-ded into a tin can? That is HILARIOUS yo! Oh mah gosh!

Beast Boy suddenly had an epiphany. "Cyborg…is that you?"

"Yes, you sexy idiot, yesssssssss!" he replied, shaking his metallic hips.

Beast Boy stared at Cyborg, then looked at Booboo, then back at Cyborg. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!" he screamed. Cyborg and Booboo began to laugh uncontrollably.

Suddenly, Birdy Girl dashed through the door. "I heard screaming! It's Slade, isn't it?! I WILL GET YOU, SLAAAAADE!" she shouted. Unfortunately, she put a little _too_ much emphasis on her dramatic entrance, and tripped over a metal sock on the floor, and flew directly into Booboo, who then flew into Beast Boy, who then flew on top of Cyborg.

Everyone shouted a collective, "OOF!" as they all tumbled down and landed in a tangle of limbs (and tin can).

"Ohhhh, yessssssss," mumbled Cyborg's muffled voice at the bottom of the pile. "Cyborg loves playing human Jenga with Beast Boy…"

"My poor, poor, virgin ears…" muttered Birdy Girl.

"I think I have girl wood," said Booboo-Shaqueshia-Fire.

"Hey," said Beast Boy, "you know what's missing?"

"What?"

"Raven…where is she, anyway?"

"Oh, I think she went to Nevermore," Cyborg replied.

"Oh…"

*cue awkward silence*

Beast Boy's stomach growled. "Oh, man! I still haven't eaten!"

Booboo grabbed a handful of tofu out of her hair. "Here, you can eat this if you want…"

Beast Boy gagged. "You know, as desperately hungry as I am…no thank you."

"Hmmph, worth a try," she said, shoving the mush into her mouth. "Disshizzisgood," she mumbled through her full mouth.

*cue round two of awkward silence (and chewing)*

Cyborg farted sparkles again.

"Eeeewwwwww!" Everyone shouted as they suddenly scrambled out of their jumbled position and exited the room.

"That's just rude," said Booboo.

Birdy Girl ran as she struggled not to barf. "There's sparkles in my mouth! There's sparkles in my mouuuuuuuth!"

"I'm going to find Raven and bother her!" shouted Beast Boy like a young shounen anime character.

"What?" shouted Cyborg. "You guys don't like sparkles? Everyone likes sparkles! Beasty-poo? Come back, lover!"

The lonely tin can hopped back onto his bed. "Whatever…I guess he doesn't like my new hot body…gotta build myself a new one!"

Cyborg began making blueprints to build himself a new body. He swore that he would look so hot, no teenage boy (that happened to be green) would be able to resist him. He would have the body of a god!

* * *

Beast Boy slowly approached Raven's door, and knocked shyly on it. Hearing no reply, he invited himself in. 'Ehhhh, she won't mind…' he thought to himself.

He walked deeper into her dark room, seeing no sign of the empath. As he approached her bed, he saw something familiar. It was a strange looking mirror – the portal into her mind.

'Nope! No way…I'm not going in there again!'

'C'mon, dude, it'll be fun…'

'No! Raven wouldn't like me going into her mind like that!'

'But what if she's in danger?'

Beast Boy stared at the mirror. "Ahhh, what the hell?" he muttered as he picked up the mirror.

"Assafrass, Mecroloan, Zicknossss!" he shouted incorrectly. A giant hand popped out of the mirror and sucked him in.

"It worrrrrrrrrrked!" he yelled as he disappeared into Raven's mind.

* * *

Kid Flash picked up the phone and put it on speaker. "Hey guys! It's Booboo!" he shouted.

The other Titans East members rushed over and sat down next to him.

"Hey, Booboo!" everyone shouted. (Apparently, the Titans East gang loves to watch Jerry Springer in the morning.)

"You guys are never gonna believe what I saw Birdy Girl doing to her pillow this morning!"

* * *

A/N: Hey again guys! Thanks for reading, I really appreciate it...

And as always, please R I really love reading your comments. You guys are the best! :3


	13. Chapter 13

A/N: Hey, it's been a long time again! I still hold by what I said in the last author's note (about _trying_ to somehow get and updating schedule together), and I'm still trying to work something out.

Again, thanks for stickin' with it, guys! Here's chapter 13 with the random meaningless title...I also hope this chapter is decent, 'cause my imagination motor is running low on juice o-o

Disclaimer: I don't own the Teen Titans.

* * *

Chapter 13 - Too Sexy For You, Part 1

"Nega-Raven!" shouted normal Raven. "So you're the one causing problems around here!"

The dark girl stormed over to the chunky 'lil hillbilly and grabbed her by the collar...er...overalls. "What are you doing in my mind?"

"Hey, you ain't gotta shout! I was going to tell you everything out of the kindness in my still-undeveloped chest! But now I don't know if I should!"

Raven sighed and released her. "Okay, okay, now spill it...please..."

"Well, you know how everyone has that one side of them that nobody really knows? Well, that's what I am to you!"

"Well, I've survived this long without you, so get lost."

"Damn, you really are a biotch when you're PMS-ing. Anyway, I can't just 'get lost.' The process of me being triggered is irreversible." Nega-Raven suddenly smacked herself in the head. "Aw, crud, I did it again!"

"Did what?" snapped Raven.

"I said somethin' intelligent! It's that hussy, Wisdom! I locked her in my basement, but she won't stop rubbin' off on me!"

Raven glared at the adolescent hick. "You locked Wisdom in your basement?! No wonder I haven't been able to find her...or think straight! I need to see her, now!"

"No can do, Rae-Rae, I can't have you ruining my cozy 'lil cul-de-sac. Especially when I'm just about to throw a party out here! I was gonna invite those bikers, and the three cute boys all named Ed! You are not," and she shook her nappy head for emphasis, "gonna ruin mah fun!" Nega-Raven raised her little pudgy hands and shouted, "sohtniZ noirteM htarazA!" A pink, sparkly blast (that smelled strangely like toenails and pigs feet) flew from her hands, straight towards Raven.

* * *

Beast Boy flew straight from the portal, into a wall. "Oof!" he shouted, reacting to the impact and slumping down onto the floor. He rubbed his sore head as his eyes came into focus. He appeared to be in some sort of tavern.

"Am I in the wrong place?" he asked himself out loud.

"No…you're definitely in the right place!" a girly voice said, with a giggle. A girl identical to Raven, wearing a purple cloak, stuck her head in front of his face unexpectedly. "It's me, Love!"

"Aaaah!" Beast Boy shouted, startled. Instinctively, he tried to jump to his feet, but instead bumped into the purple-cloaked girl. They both crashed to the ground, Love landing on top of Beast Boy. "Ouch!"

"I'm so sorry!" said Love.

"No, no, it's my fault…you just startled me."

Love stared into Beast Boy's eyes, not moving.

"Um…can you get off of me…please?" he asked shyly.

Love smirked a smirking smirk. "No can do, Beasty-Poo! Now that I have you, I'll never let you-,"

"HANDS OFF MY MAN!" shouted Brave from across the room. "AZARATH METRION ZINTHOS!"

Beast Boy watched, still pinned down, in horror, as Love was blasted through a wall, and Brave jumped onto him instead. "AAAAHHHH!" he yelled.

"Hey, Beasty," she purred, "wanna know just how 'brave' I am? I can answer all of your quest-,"

"BURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRP!" burped Rude, as she kicked Brave away from Beast Boy. As Brave flew into the hole in the wall, Rude helped Beast Boy to his feet.

"Thanks," said Beast Boy, relieved.

Randomly, she slapped him across the face, kneed him in the groin, kissed him on the cheek, and walked away. "Nope, I'm Rude, wazzbag…duh…"

As Beast Boy tried to recover from shock and trauma, three angry bikers stampeded towards him.

"AAAAARGH! HOW DARE YOU TOUCH OUR GIRLS?!" shouted Ricardo, Eduardo, and Killslice simultaneously.

"Huh?" was all the time Beast Boy had to mutter before being tackled. The force of the impact opened a rift in Nevermore, and all four of them flew through the portal.

* * *

Raven could do nothing but stare as the disgusting pink energy beam flew towards her. Suddenly, a portal opened, and four figures flew out of it; three of them were giant bikers, all in one cluster of limbs, the other was an all-too-familiar green bird that seemed to have slipped away from the three. As Ricardo, Eduardo, and Killslice all continued to fly forward, the green bird transformed back into human form. Sadly, he failed to move out of the way of the pink energy, and it hit him instead of its original target.

All of this happened almost instantaneously, and none of them really knew what happened until Beast Boy flew into Raven, and knocked her backwards into Nega-Ravens house.

"Not again!" Beast Boy shouted.

"Beast Boy?!" exclaimed Raven from under him. "You better have a damn good reason for why you're in my head! And I'm not in a good mood right now, either!"

Beast Boy jumped to his feet, and Raven stood up quickly, herself. "Well, you see…um…"

"Um…?"

"I was coming to check on you, 'cause I-we had no clue where you were, and I was all like, 'Oh, no, where's Rae-Rae?' and they were all like, 'Oh, check Nevermore,' and I was like, 'If you in-sist…' and so then I went in your room and the thing was on the bed and -,"

"Wait!" she shouted. Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed Nega-Raven tiptoeing in their direction, with pink bolts ready. "Shut up for a second!"

Suddenly, Raven turned towards Nega-Raven and sent a blash of dark energy her way.

"Oof!" she shouted, flying away into the ether.

"Continue!" she shouted demandingly. She then noticed that Beast Boy looked frightened.

"You okay, Rae?" he asked, barely audible.

Raven sighed. "Okay, sorry…just, give me an update."

"Cyborg…they got Cy," he muttered.

"Oh, no, no, no…does that mean…we're the only two left?"

"Yeah."

Raven pulled the hood off of her head, revealing her face. "That means…we have to stick together at all times," she said.

Momentarily, she saw Beast Boy's face flush red. She hadn't thought about it much, with everything crazy going on…but they had some sort of connection…didn't they? No, that was just her mind talking…right?

"…unfortunately," she added. She saw his face fall in an instant, and she suddenly pulled her hood back up. "But right now, I have to find wisdom…before _she _comes back…"

Raven grabbed Beast Boy's wrist and stepped into her own portal, dragging him along. They emerged in the basement of Nega-Raven's suburban house, where Wisdom was said to be.

"Raven, over here," whispered Wisdom's voice. They both looked over to where Wisdom was chained to the wall by a…chain made of fried chicken and biscuits.

"Uh…" said Beast Boy, "is that a chain made of southern food?"

Wisdom sighed. "No, silly, it's made out of enchanted southern food – my natural weakness."

Beast Boy looked at Raven. She ignored him. "How do I free you?" she asked.

"Well…the only way to get rid of enchanted southern food…is to eat it."

This time, they both looked at Beast Boy. "But I'm a vegetarian! You guys _know_ this!"

The two identical girls gave him the death glare. "_Do it._"(heh, heh, that's what she said).

"Fine, fine…" he muttered reluctantly. "Jeez, Raven, you're death glare is even scarier wearing glasses…" The poor changeling walked over to Wisdom and morphed himself into a dog. He bit through the enchanted food chain, and slowly made it disappear. Transforming back, he farted, then burped, as Wisdom walked over to Raven.

"Gross, Beast Boy…" said Raven. She turned towards Wisdom.

"Thanks for coming to get me," she said.

"I'm just glad you're okay, Wisdom. Everything's been going crazy, and I just need to know what to do! I need…to save my friends."

"I know, Raven, I _am _you, after all." She sighed. "But there are no spells in any library that can save them."

"Then what can I do, Wisdom? How can I fix this mess?" she asked urgently.

"You…our only choice is to go to _him_…" she said, her statement ending in a whisper.

Raven's eyes widened. "No…" she whispered.

Beast Boy, burping again, inappropriately blurted, "OOOOOOH, plot twist!"

* * *

A/N: Thanks for reading everyone...as always, I'll appreciate your feedback of any kind! See you next time, as long as highschool doesn't completely drain the life essence out of me.

P.S. I wonder if anyone can guess who the 'mystery man' that Raven and Wisdom just hinted about is...


End file.
